The Case for Pollyanna

I'm an optimist. In the midst of whatever challenge or unfortunate situation, after an initial automatic reactive "ouch", I go for the positive and the possible. People around me who call themselves "realists" tell me I'm a crazy Pollyanna who just doesn't get it. "Interesting", I say.

What I've learned in every area of my life, is that I can't control circumstances, only my response to them. If I experience weather, traffic, taxes, or a stubbed toe, I can choose what to focus on and what kind of thoughts and feelings I take forward from that situation. Does it color my day or my life in shades of gray and tension in my body? Can I do what needs to be done and feel positive just knowing that stuff happens? My life experience will take the shape and form of the feelings I have about what happens. 

"What you focus on expands" is an old maxim. So telling and retelling the negative story to myself and others serves to continue the negative thoughts, feelings, and results. Now there's a happy thought. That also means that choosing to see the positive and possible also brings more of the same. The only question here is "What do I really want?" My optimistic answer is to be happy, to be whole, to be willing and able to serve a higher good.

So that's my case for Pollyanna. If you are in the midst of a career change, switch to a more positive feeling state by asking yourself a few questions:

• What am I learning in this experience?
• What benefits are possible?'
• What do I need to do right now to move in the direction that will bring more of what I want in my life?
• Who is showing up for me as friend, supporter, or resource? Who needs me to show up as these same things for them?
• Who am I called to be in this situation?
• In spite of the challenges, how am I experiencing blessings right now? 

A recent movie, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, has a classic line. "''Everything will be all right in the end. If it's not all right, then it's not yet the end''.  Sounds pretty good to me! 

I often lead workshops and coach clients on the topic of Irresistible Attraction that has a foundation on choosing to find the positive and focusing on that. Let's chat if you'd like to know more. One of my clients came up with his affirmation on this: "Life is Good and Every Day is Christmas!". I couldn't have said it better.

Ready? Take Charge -- Get Moving

Love and light,
Diane

What's the Question?

We're trained early to go for an answer and that there is a right answer to most questions. As a result we often focus on mundane, ordinary, and wimpy questions in our networking, job seeking, and interviewing processes.

 

The truth is that a more successful strategy for influencing others and building relationships is to ask a great question ... and then to listen carefully. Seems simple, doesn't it? And yet it's the one skill that career transition-ers, managers, and sales professionals often under-utilize in the face of time and energy limitations. It seems faster and easier to ask information-oriented questions and just get it done. We assume the relationship before building it.

What makes a question a great question? A simple answer is that it is "open"; it can't be answered with one-word or a simple information stream, like "what is your name?" An excellent open question causes the other person to pause, think for a moment, and go into their own experience for a response. Here are some good open questions that can become great in the right context:

• Besides the expectation of making/exceeding quota, what does it take to be successful on this sales team?
• How does the culture of this organization/team show up or affect this position?
• What advice would you give to someone in my situation?
• How can I best serve you? 
•  What do you like best about your current ________?

 

When you are going for an information interview, job interview, prospecting appointment, project management meeting, etc., take the time to craft a list of great questions that will engage the other person. The trust/relationship bridge is strengthened when we give them a chance to be heard. The real issues, strengths, opportunities will unfold in the process.

Just another way to  - Take Charge - Get Moving!

Love and light,

Diane

 

PS: * the photo is a time-lapse of moths flying in the light

 

What's your USP?

My what? USP?

Anyone who is selling anything needs to be able to say concisely what their "Unique Selling Proposition" is. What makes YOU different and better from your competition. And believe me, whether you are in career transition or selling a service or product, you have competitors. And many of them don't know their USP ... duh.... they are doing what most people do. They are trusting that the product speaks for itself.

Here are some examples of possible USPs:

Realtor: specialize in investment properties; price it right the first time so it sells fast.

CPA: fast turnaround, take the time to understand what client is trying to accomplish

Project Manager: recognize the business impact of the process - big picture as well as detail driven

IT specialist: help you get what you really need, not just what you thought would work. (good communicator)

Administrative Assistant: anticipate and operate proactively. Systems oriented.

Diane as your Coach: fearless about asking the questions that facilitate major shifts for my clients; you get where you want to go, faster and easier

Of course for every USP there are examples you'll use in the interview that demonstrate how and why your USP is important to the interviewer or to solving the client's problem. You can find lots of information and examples on the internet, or better yet work directly with me as your coach. (just had to put in a plug!)

Take Charge -- Get moving!

Love and light,

Diane

Networking Tip #2 After the meeting

OK, so you went to the meeting or networking event and you collected several business cards. Now what?

Now you can focus on the real power of and purpose of attending networking meetings - building relationships with people you met there.

 First: remember when you accept a business card from someone to make some notes on the back of the card listing the date/event name, additional details,  or interesting info about the person.

Second: schedule a time and to make calls to request an appointment for a one-on-one meeting. It is in this meeting that you get to know each other for real by asking questions - what is their business/career, how did they get started in that business, what are they like as a person. They will be asking the same type questions about you and your business or career. At the end of that 30-60 minute informal conversation both of you will know much better how to help each other connect with potential clients or opportunities.

Third: a most important thing to remember is to stay in touch! Facebook and Linked In are powerful ways to inform people as a group about you and your business. However there is no substitute for a personal email, snail mail card/note, or a quick personal phone call to build that relationship bridge on a strong foundation. Ask an open-ended question to allow the person to talk first. Be prepared with an overview update on your life/activity and any requests you want to make.

There is magic in the one-on-one meeting. People begin to know you, to trust you, and to like you and what you have to offer. When that happens, they are much more likely to think of you when someone else has a need that you can fill AND to tell that person to contact you. It is like having a free marketing force out in the world singing your praises. And it all started with a contact made by Networking.

Take Charge - Get Moving!

Love and light,

Diane

Networking Tip #1

Are you shy? Don't know what to say when you meet new people? Believe it or not, other people may feel the same way when they attend a business networking event. There's a simple trick you can play with your mind to get you into the networking game. What if you took on the role of host or hostess with the assignment of making someone else feel welcome? 

 

By taking the focus away from your own discomfort and focusing on making someone else feel comfortable, you will find it's easier to say a few simple words to get a conversation started. In fact you may even prepare a few opening lines to get you started.

"Hi. I'm _________. (your name) Have you been to this meeting/event before?" 

"How long have you been a member of this group?" 

"I'm new to this group too - shall we find someone who's been a member for a while to tell us about the meeting?"

Make it a goal to meet and spend a few minutes getting to know at least three people. After the meeting it's important to follow up with an email or call within a few days to tell the person you enjoyed meeting them.Getting to know more about your new contacts (and vice versa) is the real goal of networking.

Will this technique transform a shy person into a superstar networker? Maybe not - but it will help you make the most of each opportunity to build relationships with people you may need to know.

Take Charge - Get Moving!

Love and light,

Diane

Networking (Again?)

Career transition, job search, sales, business ownership, entrepreneurial ventures, going to school, being a parent, finding a friend - most everything we do in life can be done better when we build strong networks. This human experience of ours is not about going it alone, it is about meeting challenges with the support of our networks.

Are you shy? Don't know what to say when you meet new people? Just not comfortable with the whole idea of networking? Or do you meet a lot of people, exchange business cards and then nothing happens? Good! Now you know where you're starting. In the next few posts I will give you some tips on how to be good at networking in any area of your work or life.

Take Charge - Get Moving!

Love and light,

Diane

Point of Power

One day at a time, one moment at a time. Staying in the present moment means staying in your "Point of Power". Right now is the only time when you can make a new decision, choose a response, forgive, and most importantly ACT. 

A focus on any other time, either past or future, is folly. There is no power to affect your destiny in any time but this present moment. Ask yourself "What are my choices right now? What is the best use of my valuable time, focus, and energy right now? Who do I need to be right now?"

Take Charge - Get Moving!

What's the Gift?

Losing your job is painful. It hurts - and it isn't fair - and it's terrifying.

In the aftermath of that event, it may not be obvious that you have a choice about how to react emotionally and behaviorally. The fact is simple - the job is gone. You probably need to have another way to earn money in a fairly short time to continue to live in the "old normal".

You can begin to create a new normal by choosing to react with gratitude. "What? Be grateful for losing the job?" you ask. Yes. Begin by asking yourself, "What's the gift in this?" The gift might be a chance to let go of old patterns of thinking and behaving that have become a rut. Maybe you have a dream on the shelf that has gotten dusty because you didn't have the time to bring it forward as a possible reality. Now you have some time to plan for a new future.

OK, so you were a teacher. What expertise did you develop in that? What, specifically, did you love about teaching? Who else needs that passion and expertise? What other dream did/do you have that aligns with the values that made teaching fun for you?

Did you work in an office "cubicle farm" that sapped your soul? What kind of home-based business would you start that is based on something you love? Consider Network Marketing with a product or service that you truly enjoy - your time and earning potential are yours to command. 

Just coming out of military service? How did you grow through that job? What do you really want to do now? You have choices. Where to live, how to embrace a lifestyle that fits your new normal, who to invite as mentor or guide.

Looking back on the event of losing the job will one day seem very different from how it looks today. Let go of the negative emotions and focus on the gift of new possibilities.

Take Charge ... Get Moving

And if you want an unconditionally supportive success partner I'm here for you as your coach.

Love and light,

Diane